The Simon Celebrates Coke Milestone

The Simon congratulated Tim Edmundson, facilities coordinator, for delivering his 20,000th can of Coke to the DM refrigerators on Tuesday. Like Mean Joe Green giving his game jersey to a young fan, The Simon gave the can of Coke to an emotional up Mr. Edmundson. "This feels awesome," said Mr. Edmundson of Squaw Valley, Calif. "I couldn't be more stoked." The Simon also presented Mr. Ednumdson with a certificate of courage for his continued hard work and a $25 gift certificate to Red Lobster.

The Simon Emerges for Promotional Deals

The recently reclusive The Simon emerged from his office and back to the Demand spotlight to help all around happenin' guy, Jeremy Reed to help @JebReed on Twitter. "This is great" Mr. Reed told TDS.
After confusion around a few of Mr. Reed's Tweets, The Simon made a quick promotional deal with Jebreedredone run by Soren Bowie.


Mr. Bowie has also had his share of gossip and buzz this week. Rumors have been flying with Mr. Bowie being romantically linked to The Movie Maven after a recent guest starring role with Ms. Perry. "No comment." Mr. Bowie told TDS with a somewhat sloppy grin on his face.

The Simon Now In 3-D

As 2010 opens, the 3D blogging landscape is heating up on the technology side.

The Daily Simon, cashing in on the success of Avatar, is now using digital 3-D technology, which requires readers to wear polarized glasses. It is a vast improvement on the sometimes headache-inducing techniques that relied on cardboard cutout glasses with red and green lenses and rose and fell in popularity in the 1950s.

“I’m speechless,” said Mandy Ng, Product Manager, who read an exclusive article of The Daily Simon. “It’s more extraordinary than any other corporate blog that is out there, or has been. It's freakin' 3-D, yo.”

Seasons Greetings From TDS

The Simon Demands Ball Down Low

The Simon let it be known to Demand, that The Simon got game. A 5'7" The Simon played more like 6'7" as he showed a dizzying array of low post moves taking Cracked's Dan "Death From Above" O'Brien to school in a friendly team building, pick-up game. The two decided to play while Death From Above was waiting for his computer to get fixed. "He's a ferocious competitor." Death told TDS. "He would score on me then inquire about the status of my mother. I had no idea he that knew her. It really got in my head."

"Biff" Bowie to Take The Simon's Date to DM Party

Soren "Biff" Bowie, the resident DM alpha male, preyed in on a sick The Simon and is now taking The Simon's date to the DM's "Enchantment Under the C:Drive" Dance. "Hey McThe Simon, your shoe's untied." Biff told The Simon.